Computer Humor - Terminology

586 - The average IQ needed to understand a PC
State-of-the-art - Any computer you can't afford
Obsolete - Any computer you own
Microsecond - The time it takes for your state-of-the-art computer to become obsolete
G4 - Apple's new Macs that make you say "Gee, four times faster than the computer I bought for the same price a Microsecond ago"
Syntax Error - Walking into a computer store and saying, "Hi, I want to buy a computer and money is no object"
Hard Drive - The sales technique employed by computer salesmen, esp. after a Syntax Error
GUI - What your computer becomes after spilling your coffee on it (pronounced "gooey")
Keyboard - The standard way to generate computer errors
Mouse - An advanced input device to make computer errors easier to generate
Floppy - The state of your wallet after purchasing a computer
Portable Computer - A device invented to force businessmen to work at home, on vacation, and on business trips
Disk Crash - A typical computer response to any critical deadline
Power User - Anyone who can format a disk from DOS
System Update - A quick method of trashing ALL of your software